Thank You

I couldn't leave this blog for 18 months without thanking everyone I love. Not all of them will read this blog, but at least I can record my gratitude for them. I have met so many amazing people this past year who have taught me the meaning of true friendship. They have helped me and supported me, listened when I needed someone to listen, discussed important things with me, and comforted me when I was going through hard times. I lived with and nearby so many people in Provo who truly cared about me, and showed me so through simple actions. They probably have no idea about all the times they said the right thing or did the right thing just when I needed it. They taught me what Christlike love is all about.

So to all of you who I have associated with, thank you. Thank you for truly caring and showing me what true friendship is. You probably have no idea how much you helped me.

Mission: Possible

It's almost time for me to leave for my mission. This has been a great summer: busy but great. I've been able to spend lots of time with family, relatives, and friends. Whether I was boating on Lake Washington with my family, jumping in the lake with cousins at a family reunion, or dancing the night away with friends, I enjoyed every minute of my summer in Seattle. Now my parents dropped the bomb that they will probably be moving while I'm on my mission. If all goes according to plan, I will be coming back to a new house when I return: not the house I've lived in for 20 years. Even so, I've learned countless times that it's not the places or the things that matter; it's the people you love. So onward I go to the MTC in Provo, knowing that those I love will be cheering for me.

As I pack up my room, ready my bags, and clean the house for my farewell festivities, many crazy things are happening. Firstly, I got sick, and they don't let you in the MTC if you're sick. Thank you to Heavenly Father, I am getting better. Secondly, I stepped on a rusty can. So if I don't die of swine flu, I will die of tetanus. In all seriousness, though, I am feeling great. A little nervous, yes; a little overwhelmed, yes; but a little excited, SI!

I'm ready to jump off the precipice and tackle this latest challenge. I know that I will not be able to do this by myself. Only through Christ can I have the strength and the ability to serve a full-time mission. So I'm counting on His help, because I definitely need it.

Things I Dislike/Things I Love

10 Things I Greatly Dislike:
1. When people make a big hype over something or someone that doesn't deserve it (eg, High School Musical)
2. People who think they're "all that"
3. People with no morals
4. Abuse or neglect of children
5. Selfish leaders who abuse their authority
6. People who do not follow through (say they will do something and don't)
7. Wasting a life (through laziness, addictions, etc.)
8. Worshiping of celebrities or other pop-culture icons
9. Rude people who look down on others
10. Worldliness

20 Things that Make Me Happy:
1. Singing with people to piano or guitar
2. The fresh smell of a newly-printed book
3. Gospel discussions with friends
4. The stomach-dropping feeling on a roller coaster
5. Real hugs (none of that side-hug nonsense)
6. Seeing my work in print
7. Finishing writing a story and wrapping it all up
8. London in general
9. Bookstores and libraries
10. Running into a good friend
11. Bright sun and blue skies
12. Being in the water
13. Learning something new all on my own
14. Hanging out with my family after church
15. Creation: writing a song, play, movie, or story
16. Cousins
17. Witty comments
18. Laughter
19. Childhood and make-believe
20. Prayer

Patriotism

I wanted to post the third verse of the Star Spangled Banner:
Oh, thus be it ever, when free men shall stand
Between their loved homes, and the war's desolation
Blessed with victory and peace, may the heaven-rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation!
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust!"
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave


Yes, this verse is in the national anthem of our country, the national anthem that everyone, be they religious or not, sings. My favorite line is "May the heaven-rescued land praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation!" As a nation, we need to remember who founded this country: our Heavenly Father (this is why "Power" is capitalized). God made our nation and preserves it when we follow him; in fact, this nation is "heaven-rescued". We were founded purely through the blessings of God, and time and time again we are preserved by the mercy of the Lord. Sadly, people forget why our nation was founded. People forget our motto, In God is our trust. Only by using this motto and aligning our causes with the cause of God can the star-spangled banner "wave in triumph".

This is truly an amazing country. It was established with Christian values as a God-fearing nation where each person is free to worship God in their own way. Only in a country like this could the fullness of the gospel be restored.

It's sad when the leaders of this country lose sight of the vision of the country: that it was founded as a place where people could be free to choose liberty and live full lives. That it was established as a place where we could respect God's laws and the laws of the land. That it was made so that we would fight wars only when "our cause is just". That it was founded as a nation where we rely on God for our strength; when we boast in the strength of men, God always shows us who is really in charge. It is the Lord who made us, and the Lord who preserves us.

I hope that each of us can "praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation", and that then our nation can be "blessed with victory and peace".

Mission Blessings

I just realized that I haven't said anything about my mission! I got called to serve in Tempe, Arizona (Spanish speaking). I've heard good things about the mission and am so excited to serve the people there! It is going to be such an amazing (difficult, but amazing) experience!

I've received so many blessings in conjunction with my mission call. I'm grateful to have received the call at BYU, where there were so many people to help and support me. My roommate got her mission call the same day, so we were able to prepare together. Actually, our friend decided to "train" us for our missions... he had us be "companions" and study Preach My Gospel together, and then teach a discussion to someone. That was an amazing experience in itself. Studying with my roommate helped me so much because we learned a ton as we discussed principles of the gospel. Teaching the lessons with someone's specific needs in mind really blessed all of us. I really felt that I was inspired as I learned to have the spirit work through me in helping me choose who to teach, what to teach them, and what to say. I felt that I should teach my other roommate about a topic that I hadn't even realized before that she was struggling with. Also, when my "companion" and I were supposed to choose someone to teach, she decided to teach someone that I also felt was who we should teach.

Anyway, I was able to talk to many return missionaries who gave me great advice. There were lots of people who had served Spanish-speaking missions, and even one girl who had served in Arizona. Several people gave us lessons from Preach My Gospel and just talked with us. Elisa studied the Spanish Book of Mormon with me. They all have no idea how much they helped me.

Leading up to receiving my mission call, I had several experiences that strengthened me. My RM friend told me about receiving her call and how it wasn't what she expected, but she learned to love where she served. I went running and saw a beautiful rainbow, and later I also saw a rainbow extending from Y Mountain to the apartments behind me. For me, the rainbows were a sign of God's love and peace.

When I opened my mission call, I had so many friends there to support me. I had no idea where I would be going on my mission, but I feel at peace with where I will be serving and am very excited about this opportunity.

Today I was praying about what I should do to further prepare for my mission. I have been studying PMG and El Libro de Mormon, but I wondered what else I should do. I ran into the Spanish-speaking Sister missionaries, and they were able to give me all kinds of encouragement and advice. They asked me if I wanted to go on splits with them some time. Whether I go or not, it was so great just to talk to them and get some encouragement.

I may not be the most spiritual or the most friendly person in the world, but I know that going on a mission is the right step for me now in my life. On my mission, I hope to gain a stronger relationship with the Savior and gain a better understanding of the atonement. I hope to feel Christlike love for the people I serve. I also hope to learn how to rely on the spirit. I hope to gain confidence and interpersonal skills so I am better at approaching people and discussing the gospel with them. I hope to gain a stronger testimony of the gospel and of the restoration of the gospel. Mostly, I hope to influence the people I serve and in some way help them to come closer to Christ. No matter how many baptisms I have, I hope to help the people live the gospel to the fullest and strive to become more Christlike- and that's what I want to do, too.

Balance

It's definitely time for a new post! And I've been thinking about a lot of things lately that I need to get down in writing. Ever since I finished the first draft of Walls, I've been putting writing aside, and I miss it...so this will be a good warm-up.

I've been talking to a friend of mine who was wondering how to balance school and social life. His life is so blocked out with work and study that he doesn't have time to devote to meaningful relationships, and he wanted advice. I wouldn't say that having a social life comes completely naturally to me, but having friends and building relationships is just an important part of my life that I can't block out. If you're always scheduling everything (and I should know, because I'm a planner), you don't leave any time to help people in need or create quality relationships with other people.

In institute the other day the teacher mentioned something I've heard before, that there are only two things you can take with you to the next life: knowledge and relationships. The statement had never quite struck me in the way it did then. My friend was focusing on one aspect (knowledge), but life is all about learning to balance both. We need to be building both our knowledge AND our relationships if these are the most important things to gain in this life. It's important to understand how much other people matter and how we should work to build our relationships with others so we can influence each other's lives. I hope that I can learn to love the people I serve on my mission and that I can meet people whom I can influence... and vis versa. And I hope to better balance these two important aspects of my life: increasing my knowledge AND building relationships.

Living

I was thinking about Thoreau's quote to suck the marrow out of life and LIVE. Sometimes we get so caught up in the little things of life that we forget that life is about LIVING. Life isn't about just surviving and doing the same things day to day. It's all about growing and learning and becoming better each day. Even if we think we've improved ourselves, there is always something we can be doing for others and using what we've learned to help other people.
Sadly, this is something I haven't really grasped until I came to college, but I think hopefully I understand a little better what life is all about. Just think about all the people in the world who go to the same boring jobs everyday and come home to the same wasteful lives...not to sound harsh or anything, but life is so much more than that.
At my internship, I work for an LDS magazine, so I get to write a lot of fun service articles from an LDS perspective. I've been interviewing some people recently who have done so much with what they've learned to bless lives. A professor of food science developed a food dryer and introduced it to people in the Pacific Islands so they could have food storage. A man I talked to today developed a simple gardening method and he distributed his video throughout the world so people could follow the advice of the prophet and have a garden. A baseball team is going to the Dominican Republic for some games, and while there they're going to teach some clinics and give the kids some equipment, and also go on splits with the missionaries.
ANYWAY, I think these people realize what life is all about...developing ourselves and using that to bless others. :)

Gag me with syrup

Here is a tribute to LDS writers who write sappy romance novels:

Mary saw him across the dance floor and met his sparkling blue eyes. A wave of passion hit her. She watched with bated breath as he stepped toward her.
"Hello, madam," said the tall dark handsome man, sweeping into a bow. "Shall we dance?"
She sighed, unable to speak. As he swept her into his arms, she felt that she could dance forever.
"I...don't know your name," sighed Mary as she glided across the dance floor with the gentleman, feeling as if her heart was flying.
"Names are not important," said the man. "All that matters is that you're beautiful."
Mary smiled at him. Her fingers reached out to stroke his smooth cheek. Her fingers reached for his face...
and she pulled off his mask.
"Nice try, Eddie," she said. "You can't be a hot guy, even on Halloween."

Reading Days

Oh, reading days. A glorious never-ending session of eating, sleeping, playing, and studying, with more weight given to eating, sleeping, and playing. Did I study last night? No, I roasted marshmallows on the bell tower lights and made a claymation movie. What a fabulous existence.

This dang novel

Last day of my writing class. :( I have to finish this dang novel! I just have to!

Writing and Truth

This has been weighing on my mind since my Writing for YA class got out half an hour ago, so here goes... We talked about truth in writing and having the truth come through. What we've been stressing the entire semester is that you can't preach to your readers. You tell your story, and you let your character grow and experience and make choices, but you don't go to your story thinking: I am going to give my readers this great lesson about such-and-such. Anyway, today an author came in and talked to us about the unique perspective we have as LDS writers. Writing is all about finding "truth", and in the LDS culture, we believe we have truth. It is our responsibility to make our inner truth shine through in our writing. It's interesting how many people are looking for truth. You can always find this search for spirituality and direction in YA writing, particularly through the main character's moral struggles. There is often also a Christ-figure in YA writing who leads the character (there is one is many many books that I have read recently...and now I realize that there's one in my novel, but I when I wrote him in, I wasn't thinking, "this is my Christ-figure", I was thinking, "For some reason I feel like my main character needs this character to help her in the novel). Anyway, writers and readers are looking for this direction and meaning, and LDS writers have this to some extent. So while we can't preach, we can show through our story the search for spirituality and the hope it brings about. The author today also talked about the spirit directing her in her writing, and how she felt that God wanted her to tell certain things. I believe even God cares about how we touch people through writing, and He can direct us through writing to tell our stories in the best possible ways that will affect readers' lives. I have had been experiences through reading where I have learned about life and about who I am. Sometimes I finish a book thinking "WOW", and the issues in the book pry at me after I'm finished and affect the kind of person I am and what I believe. THAT, I think, is the mark of a good book: something that can affect you in this way. And that's how I hope to write.

Planning vs. Spontaneity

Life is fabulous right now.
I know what I'm doing with my life.
I had a break-down a few weeks ago because I was so confused about what I should do with the next few years of my life/forever....but at least I have the next few years planned out by now.
For spring term, I'm staying in Provo and living with mostly the same roomies. Kylie is going to move nearby with her friends. I will be doing an internship for LDS Living magazine, and working....somewhere.
For the summer I am going home and Kylie and I are going to do our old Boy Scout job- so excited!
In the fall, I am leaving on my mission.
When I get back, I will have a year left of school.
So that's my life right now, as far as I can factor everything anyway.
I'm turning 21 in 2 days! These are the last 2 days of being young and wild and free, so I better cherish them! Now I have to be an O-fficial adult and be super responsible. I'm so scared for the future and the unknown....yet that makes it all the more exciting!!!
I am learning from my roommate Breanna that I need to be more spontaneous. I'm so used to having everything exactly planned out for my future because I like to know what's coming...I don't like to be in suspense. She just lives day by day and doesn't know what the heck she's doing next year. Example- one day I was helping her plan out her life and all of a sudden she jumped up and said: "We're getting a pet!" So we all jumped in the car, drove to the pet store, and bought a hamster. Spontaneous- yes. Awesome- yes. At the time I was like, "I can't, I have homework!", but if I hadn't have gone, I would have REALLY regretted it. So I think it's good for me to add a little more spontaneity and flavor in my life. Then again, it's also good to be somewhat planned for the future. Maybe if Breanna and I merged ourselves together, we could live the perfect life. Ha ha ha. Really though, I think sometimes I live too much in the future. I'm always worried about what's going to happen to me, and sometimes I don't slow down enough to just enjoy myself day-by-day, and leave some room for surprise! If I live in the moment a little more, each day becomes special, and I won't be looking back on my life saying, "Well that happened fast! What did I even do?" but I'll be able to have great memories- yes, even the spontaneous ones.

Mission

I decided to go on a mission. This was honestly the toughest decision of my life. I started thinking about it last year, at least I little bit. I was friends with someone who was deciding to go and she told me how she had come to the decision. I was thinking- wait, I'm going to be 21 next year! Crap...I have to start thinking about this! I know some people decide really quickly and just go, but I'm not like that. I have to plan my life in advance. A year and a half is a LONG time! So I thought about it over the summer, and told my mom I was thinking about it. I was expecting her to be excited, but she didn't seem too excited, which I thought was weird. I found out later though, that it was nothing against me. She just wasn't ready to let me go. I think going to London really helped her realize how okay it is for me to go somewhere, though. Anyway, last semester I was struggling because sometimes I would feel SO good about going, and other times I wouldn't...or I guess fear would get in the way. But I did have a few experiences where I felt really good about serving a mission. Finally, I just decided to decide! I decided to take action and see if God was going to stop me. He didn't. So here I am. And I have felt that this is the right decision for me. But I still have doubts and fears all the time. Heck though, if fear is the only thing keeping me back, that's ridiculous! I might as well go. I think I will regret it if I don't.

I just want to write

I'll admit it. I totally forgot that I had this blog until Mel asked me why I hadn't posted anything. Whoops. So this one is for you, Mel.
Despite the fact that I haven't been writing in this blog, lately I had an epiphany. I want to be a writer! Well, I already knew that, but I don't really care about being an editor as much. I just want to write! Maybe this came to me when I was doing my loads of editing homework...I don't know...but I think it came when I started working on my novel for my Young Adult Lit class. I am so excited about this novel! So now I just want to write, not edit. The problem is, I need money. So I'm going to hang out in the engineering department to find a rich husband. Just kidding, I'm not. But I want to be a writer!!! Please please please somebody publish my book someday!